'The Rose Water Story' 
By Ken Aitken    
    When he was in hospital in February 1996 
 
I was up working on a landscape construction site at Noosa Heads on the Sunshine
Coast of Queensland in Australia for a friend of mine called John. This was the
early December 1995. We were staying down the coast further at Peregian Beach with
one of John s relatives.  We had only been there two days and several of us went
boogie-boarding in the surf. As a consequence I came off my board in the shallow
surf, hitting the sand with my forehead and apparently staggered out of the water
with blood running from my nose. My friend, John helped  me  out of the water and
eventually got an ambulance to Nambour Hospital. This radical, life changing day was
on the 4th of December 1995. 
 
I stayed in Nambour till 6th December when I was flown by medical helicopter to the
Princess Alexandra Hospital in Brisbane. Unbeknown to the doctors, I had multiple
skull fractures. These could not be seen on the x-rays because of air running around
in my brain. This resulted in an artery being pinched off to the frontal part of my
brain (This is the executive section of the brain). 
 
On 8th Dec as a consequence of this clipping off of the blood vessel, I had a big
bleed on the brain and I had to have an urgent brain operation. Because of the
bleed, I completely lost my ability to walk, talk and eat solid food. I had severe
ABI (Acquired Brain Injury).  
 
After coming out of Intensive Care Unit (ICU), I was placed in the Critical Care
Section of M7, the ward for brain injured people. While I was in Ward M7, the
doctors believed I had damaged my thirst mechanism. I apparently did not know when
to stop drinking. The doctors called this disease, Polydipsia. It was as if I had
been in the Sahara Desert for two weeks with insufficient to drink. I had such an
insatiable thirst that I dreamed of drinking all the water from the end of a running
garden hose. I believed at the time the nurses were just being difficult when they
forcibly limited my water intake to three litres of water a day. 
 
I have since found out from a nursing relative that in such a case as mine, it has
been reported that if you drink too much water, your kidneys can fail from water
overload. The doctors had to ascertain whether my problem was physical or
psychological so everything I drank was recorded on a chart at the foot of my bed.
How to get a 230ml-hospital cup of water became the whole goal of my day. When the
nurses came on ward rounds with torches at about four in the morning, I would be
awake for the morning, I would be awake for that welcome light. `Could I have some
water, please?  If I was within the three litres per day, which I was allowed to
drink, I could have some.  
 
Polydipsia was such an acute problem that I felt on the edge of insanity. In M7, I
desperately wanted the doctors to change their minds on the quantity of water I
could have. In protest I began throwing anything from cutlery to boxes of tissues
out the window. Fortunately, there was a metre wide shelf outside the window, which
prevented things from hurtling down from the 7th floor to the pavement below. 
 
Eventually in Feb 1996, I was transferred to the Head Injuries Unit (HIU for short)
in the same hospital. I still had this major thirst problem. I was so discouraged
with this problem of how to get enough water to drink; I almost quit on
rehabilitation. It was here that I had a very funny experience. They still had me on
water restrictions. I guess they were trying to get to the bottom of the problem.  
 
The nurses suddenly announced to me one night that I was to have a test. I had to
fast from 9.00 o clock that night to 7.00am in the morning. It was never explained
to me the reasons for this test and as a result I saw it as the doctor s test, not
mine. 
 
I was awake at 11.00 p.m. at night and absolutely dying of thirst. What could I do?
I could get into my wheelchair or walk around by hanging onto the walls. I then saw
the vase of roses in fresh water, which Harriet my wife, had brought in for St.
Valentines Day, the previous day. This night would have been February 15th. Grabbing
onto the cupboard doors, I got out of bed. I took the roses and threw them into my
wardrobe. I drank the vase of fresh water and said to myself `That is the best St.
Valentines Day present Harriet could have given me!! . 
 
In the morning, at about 6.30 a.m., I was concerned for the wilted roses. I took the
empty vase to the bathroom in my wheelchair. I was busily rinsing out the vase when
Sister Clare who ran the ward came upon me and asked me  Did you drink the water
from the vase?   Oh no , I lied.  I m just getting new water for my roses .  
 
A week later, my conscience was really nagging me about lying. I said to Sister
Clare,  I have something to say to you. I DID drink the water from the vase. I am
sorry I lied to you the other week . Out of that confession came a lot of trust. I
began to obtain water for myself and the problem of my thirst quickly went away.  
 
If it was Polydipsia as I now believe it was, I don t know how this event
corresponded with my physical thirst. Somehow, the water restrictions were lifted,
as the doctors never came back to check on my final outcome. I just know that period
of my hospitalisation was extremely difficult. I only came to this understanding it
was Polydipsia in late 1997. I believed the nursing staff were just being negligent
with my water. I have perused the details of all this through my Medical File as I
had permission from the Freedom of Information Officer at the PAH but I am none the
wiser. (I can drink only two litres / day and not feel thirsty as I did in
Hospital). 
 
In HIU, therapists taught me to walk again and talk properly. My speech was very
slurred and slow from what was called dysarthria, which comes from the muscles in
your throat being affected. The therapists helped get my scrambled head back
together again. In April 1996, I was just beginning to walk again instead of using a
wheelchair. I also had to learn to write again. In March  96, my level of
comprehension was such that my speech pathologist had me doing simple definitions of
words. My writing was so bad, she had me begin to type them on the computer so she
could read it. From there she had me begin to write a speech in preparation for my
homecoming party when I came out of hospital in May. From having to learn to write
again I progressed: It began as  symbolic pictograms (almost childlike drawings), in
M7, to very scratchy writing in HIU, to readable hand writing and to the use of my
computer all over again when I got out of hospital. 
 
Eventually I was able to leave hospital. I had been in hospital six long months. The
day I was able to leave HIU was a day of intense elation. As Harriet, my wife, drove
me down the driveway of HIU, I well remember the sense of accomplishment. I had made
it! I had been in hospital for six long months from 4th December 1995 to 24th May
1996. 
 
It is  now over ten years on from this time period in my life. In this time I have
called myself the  Recycled Man . I still cannot drive but my wife and two children
can drive  me around or I frequently use public transport. One major consequence of
this new life is that I now have a passion to build inner community with many
people.  
 
This side of the accident since I was hospital from 8th December 1996 to now, I have
really discovered people in a big way. I have really come to value people, no matter
who they are, what they do or say. I have developed a passion to build inner
community with many people around the world especially by e-mail. As I am on a
permanent paid holiday through my life-long Income Protection, I have time to spend
with people in a way I never could do in my busy business. 
 
For twenty years, I had run my own business in Landscape Design and Construction,
doing very creative individual designer gardens for wealthy residential clients. I
was more an artist than businessman. I thought of a landscape as would a sculptor in
a solid medium, but I saw it as a three-dimensional piece of space which people
walked through. This space changed with time as it grew and changed with the time of
day: shadows vs. sun patterns, boulders, colour, plants, trees, earth-forms, solid
structures and water. These were the ingredients in a subtle flow of landscape
design and construction. Rather an intangible product to sell and run a business
with!! 
 
I wanted to be successful in making money but the creative side and the financial
success of the business were in constant tension. With the landscape business I was
in, there always had a severe downturn in winter. 
 
The year of the accident, I had very little work and money was very short as a
result. It was the worst year for business I have been through in twent
y odd years. I felt under incredible stress and my wife Harriet and two teenage
children were really feeling the pressure as well.  
 
I was under such extreme pressure from the lack of work and at a point of
desperation. I was ready to give it all away. I didn t know which way to turn as I
had invested years of study and resources into my chosen career and now it seemed
fruitless. I had finished a B.Sc. at University of Queensland in the 1970 s and had
completed most of a Graduate Diploma in Landscape Architecture at QUT in the late
1980 s. I found it is impossible to have business and exam deadlines running
together and on one very important project, I had let an important exam assignment
pass by. 
 
I was more an ideas, admin and marketing sort of person, good at the design side but
not so good at the practical implementation side of the business. Because of the
fluid nature of a garden, it was very difficult to be involved in just design,
without having to get fully involved in the production side.  
 
Give me any site, no matter how difficult and I would come up with a range of
possibilities which were practical. I had a very sharp awareness of what I wanted to
achieve but not always the best to make a profit even though I always planned to
make one! However, I loved doing what I did. 
 
In 1981, we built a unique natural house out of recycled timber which people often
come out to see. I had run an environmental landscape design and construction
business for twenty years  so  I had the skills to put things together like this.
This is on our five acres of light open eucalypt bush at Chambers Flat, Brisbane.
The house is largely of glass set into a post and lintel construction of 100 ++ year
old broadaxed timbers and sandstone walls. The total concept of indoor-outdoor flow,
has a nice ambience to it and the design is unique and lends itself well to future
development. See the website of the house at: 
 http://historyofkenshouse.blogspot.com/ 
 
 
With my accident I went from being:  
 
1.        Outer Physical Gardener (Outer Sustainability).. >>>>>>>>>>>....  2. Inner  Life
Gardener (Inner  Sustainability) 
 
1.        Outer Sustainability: In a gardening and agriculture sense  .. can certain
practices be maintained .. is what you doing now preparing the way ahead for new
life? It was a very difficult business in which to make money, mainly due to the
very non-standard and the seasonal nature of the work. My former life was not
sustainable  .. my creativity in my business couldn t be standardised vs. a
successful business needs to be like a biscuit cutter  . Making a few $$ off large
numbers of components 
 
 
2. Inner Sustainability: In an ongoing personal sense  . Can your life be maintained
to?  .. is what you doing now preparing the way ahead for new life? I have also
discovered the significance of the  Inner and Outer Life. Sustainability I have come
to see, has to be a wholistic view on life of Inner, Middle and Outer Persons.
Problems come because things do not change from the Outside  to  Inside but from the
Inside to the  Outside.  
 
 
Inner and  Outer  Life:  
 
Everyone of us has a private space in our lives that we carefully guard. I call it 
The Garden of Life  A garden is a personal space you can go out into and to enjoy
the peace, the cool air, the shadows of trees, the sun shining with translucent
light through tree leaves and palm fronds, the perfume of beautiful blossoms.  
 
No one else comes there except yourself and your family. Even friends do not just
drop in. They are invited out there with you after you have let them into your
house. Strangers who come are intruders and will be dwelt with by the police.  
 
It is the same with relationships. You have enter someone s inner life with their
consent. You do this by valuing the person with great value and listening intently
to what they say, as though it absolutely important. By listening intently
(consciously in a rational way and unconsciously with your intuition), you are as it
were gently knocking on the door of their inner house. If that person trusts you,
they will then invite you into the garden of their life. Then you can talk gently
back and forth and then you have established a relationship with them. They will
open their door of their inner life at a later time if you knock. To keep that
process going is a Sustainable Relationship. If I act suspiciously or try and crash
the door with a sledge hammer, I will not be let in. That is what I call an
Unsustainable Relationship. 
 
Because I cannot drive at the moment due to my accident, I can drive on the Internet
 . I can go around the world and be back in my office in few minutes, all for $25.00
/ month and see hundreds of people along the way through e-mailing. Since March
2001, I have started the following e-mail broadcasts: 
 
Since March 2001, I have started the following three e-mail broadcasts:  
 
         Brain Injury Survivor Network (BISN) for Brain Injury People: I help facilitate
the Brain Injury Survivor Network and an international website (at
www.braininjury-survivors.org) which all started in late 2001. Recently the
president of the Singapore Brain Injury Association  e-mailed me to be on my
e-mail broadcasts. In a similar way, a researcher at a main London hospital also
e-mailed me to be on my  e-mail broadcasts as they were setting up a global Brain
Injury contacts network. It now goes all the world with nearly 200 people a month
looking at my website around the world. 
 
The statistics for brain injury in Queensland alone are that there are apparently
11,000 people a year in this state who finish up with a brain injury from various
causes. Of those who survive, 4000 of these people will be permanently disabled in
some way with reduced brain function capabilities. Less than two hundred of these
can expect to receive the quality of care and further rehabilitation they need and
let alone deserve. Brain injury in Qld. was only classified as a disability in 1999.
Before that it was treated as a health issue. This state is a long way behind other
Australian states. Any support to brain injury people is a valuable one. 
 
         Ken and Harriet s Place e-mail broadcast ..... to lighten up your day .... bring
some fun, laughter and a different perspective on life.  
 
           New Earth Community  e-mail broadcast: I have started this broadcast for a new
spirituality, life motivation and encouragement e-mail broadcast .... an e-mail
broadcast service called which has grown since March 2001 to hundreds of people
around Australia and the world now. The purpose is to encourage, inspire and
teach some new things that many people haven t thought of  . Through stories and
some Power Point presentations  . Lots of beautiful pictures and words fading in
and out.  
 
 
__________________________________________ 
 
03.12.05 

Email Ken