I have permanent damage from huffing...!!

Hello everyone. Thank you for taking the time to read my very heartfelt message! I have a traumatic brain injury (TBI) and other permanent damage from inhalant use/huffing (inhaling fumes) and wanted to share my warning with others about the dangers of any type of inhalant -- also known as sniffing, bagging, or ballooning. I unfortunately know first-hand about the dangerous, life-ruining effects of inhaling chemicals from when I was 12. (I'm now in my 30's.) I am reminded each day, every day of the damage that I did to myself. And I'm Not looking for pity, I'm just stating the facts as they are :) Those that mainly use inhalants tend to be anywhere from grade school to college age. Chemicals used as inhalants are typically very flammable and can be extremely explosive.

Inhalants refer to any household or industrial product that one inhales to produce a cheap, quick, so Not-Worth-It high. Most just think of inhalants as "just" another drug. However, they are actually very toxic poisons. These poisons, when inhaled, latch onto the fatty tissues in our organs in our brains (literally dissolving brain cells) and spinal cord, kidneys, heart, liver, continuing to do major damage! These poisons can put one at greater risk for developing neurological diseases such as Alzheimer's and Multiple Sclerosis (MS is when the myelin sheath that covers and protects the nerve cells wear away).

Nitrous oxide (laughing gas and whipped cream dispensers also called whippets) or helium (gas for balloons) may sometimes be present at college parties and used as an inhalant. The students mistakenly believe that it's not the harmful poison that it actually is. (*When administered by a licensed dentist in a medical setting, nitrous oxide is relatively safe.) Examples of other inhalants include glue, paint, gasoline, air freshener, perfume, any aerosol spray-can, inhaling air (gas) from a balloon to get that high-pitched sound with one's voice, and even burning incense. A father went on the Oprah Winfrey Show awhile ago and tragically told of how his younger daughter suffocated and died right on the spot, from inhaling air from a balloon to try to get that high-pitched sound. Her parents were unfortunately not aware of the risks and now she's gone!

A person can die or become permanently disabled from huffing the 1st or 10th time!! Just last year, a NJ teen died while huffing at an outdoor hangout with a friend. And that's with all of that ventilation! How sad and frightening. Someone posted to me on a message board about how her best friend's brother died from huffing when his lungs literally froze up!!

Why did I do something so stupid and reckless? I feel that I mainly huffed to self-medicate. I had depression and anxiety most of my life (and still do and it's much worse) and I was trying to find a way to feel better mentally. Inhalants can actually be physically and mentally addicting.

As a result of my inhalant use/TBI, to this day, I deal with the long-term, life-long irreversible effect which include: Severe memory loss, Severe dizziness (feels as bad or worse than the flu), Chronic fatigue, Nystagmus (quick, involuntary eye movements) indicating Damage to the Cerebellum in my Brain (cerebellum's responsible for balance and coordination and speech which I also have trouble with), the nystagmus can make it very difficult to read words and focus on objects with the eyes, Dysarthria (problems saying words), Word-finding problems (finding the right words when wanting to speak -- even simple words), Severe reading comprehension problems, Written and Auditory (hearing) perceptual problems, Poor attention span and ability to concentrate on various tasks. I have Severe panic attacks and depression.

I have a lot of Nerve damage/numbness to my face, hands, and other areas and have Trouble Smiling due to the nerve damage. I also have a Severe Grating at the back of my neck when nodding my head up and down even a little bit, most likely due to Damaged Bone Marrow (the fatty inner tissue that lines the bones). So yeah, I'm pretty messed-up!!

What kinds of things am I Unable to do now and/or do Not enjoy anymore because of my inhalant injury/TBI? I am no longer able to enjoy and have difficulty riding a bicycle, swimming (I was an avid swimmer), going on amusement rides, swinging on a swing, dancing, exercising, skating, even just sitting in a chair can be tough because I can Actually physically feel the damage to my brain and bone marrow. I have trouble chewing food and swallowing sometimes and tend to choke more easily on food than most people. Walking can even be difficult along with other activities because of the severe dizziness that I have and poor balance and coordination. So the quality of my life has obviously gone waaay down due to my wanting to self-medicate by huffing.

Please, if you find yourself even thinking of doing this as a way to perhaps self-medicate and/or self-destruct (or conform to others), Don't! Talk to someone that you trust: a teacher, friend, clergy, counselor, parent, or guardian. Perhaps you can go to a free support group such as Narcotics Anonymous (NA). Please feel free to print this out and show to others. And please keep in mind that Noone is immune from trying huffing whether from a nurturing household or not, a straight-A student or not. Here's a website if interested in learning more about the dangers of inhalant use: www.inhalants.org

Please try to find healthier more positive ways to deal with life on a daily basis. Bless you and please take good care, Aimee

Email Aimee