As has been mentioned here before my rebirth, the day my TBI happened was September 17, 1976 when I was 15. I was returning from a horseback riding trip with a church youth group. I can not remember the "accident" at all (I guess I am lucky). From what I was told the car I was in rolled twice and I was thrown out of the car ending up some 50 feet away from it. Coming to "rest" with my head hitting a fence post and my right foot behind my head on left shoulder. After two years of inpatient and outpatient rehabilitation I was ready to face life.

Being "ready to face life" was one thing I was not. My life consisted getting up in the morning, getting a ride to school, spending the day at school then waiting for my mom to pick me up after school. In the evening I mainly educated my mind by watching TV. That was my life's routine until I found drugs and alcohol.

My finding of the chemical escape coincided with my receiving of my insurance money. By using the chemicals I did not have to face whom Scott was. I did not and would not face the life I thought I was ready to face. For the next two years did I every live the life. After five years of escaping who I was I was lead to a twelve-step program. There I realized that "nothing, absolutely nothing happens in God's world by mistake" and until I could accept who I was I could not be happy.

Now I was "ready to face life on life's terms". I realized that in life if someone has a problem with me it is exactly that, his or her problems not mine. I have had to deal with that in every work place I have been in, outside of rehab. Being either unable to meet the exceptions of my bosses or working with people who think that because I was not in a wheelchair or did not have a white cane I was a "normie".

In November of 1996 I was forced out of the work place. I had believed that attaining employment with the Provincial Government of Saskatchewan, in 1988, I was set for life. I thought I had the security of an occupation I would be at until retirement, was I mistaken. I worked for three different departments within the government and run into problems at all three. The final job I had was with the Securities Commission in Regina. There it was I ran into the most damaging of my job difficulties. In the end I ceased my employment with the government in August of 1997.

In September of 1997 I pulled up stakes and moved from Regina to Calgary, Alberta. Regina had been my home for all my life, my family lived there and the network of various support people I had built in the 21 years previous. Wanting to pursue an occupation rather then a job. I decided to use my own money to do something I enjoyed. That choice is web page design. Then on November 30th of 1997 I hit a car that ran a red light.

In that accident I lost unconsciousness for a period of 10 to 15 seconds. The ambulance attendant said that I had received a mild concussion. I did not seek immediate medical help. However I have been under a Doctor's care since.

Today I feel that I have lost who I was. Today, being on long term disability, I walk around as if I have a mild concussion feeling as if I have reverted back to who and where I was in 1976. I know that if I lose the faith and trust in God I lose Scott. The desire to see why God has set me out on this path to make me a better person is what I need to remind myself when times get tough.

If I had to judge which accident has effected me the most I would have to say the one in 1997. Even thought it was the minor of two accidents it has just sent my life for a loop. I am not able to work, lost a lot of the interest I once held in computers. Losing the tools I once had, such as coping skills, are lost. There are a few good points from the 1997 accident. The first is I can watch reruns of "Whose Line Is It Anyways" and still laugh:). Another point is the fact I am on medicine that helps my dealing with my moods. I know if I ran and hide in alcohol and illegal drugs my life, if I still had one, totally lost.

I Wrote The Words to a song which you can find at http://www.leoalli.com.br/why.ra

As mentioned above I have had two brain injuries one in 1976 and the other in 1997. Since the last time I have added to this page I have had a MRI. The results of that test showed I damage to my left frontal lobe. My 1976 accident bruised my brain stem.

For my recovery this time things are a lot different. Now there is, what I like to call, a network that assists the person who has suffered a brain injury. In 1976 it seems like I was just injured just like anyone else. It was like I went through the OT and PT with everyone else at the rehab centre. If this makes sense, I feel some jealously towards the people who suffer a TBI these days. Today the recovery of a TBI patient is more orientated to their recovery. Today in Regina there is the Acquired Brain Injury (ABI) unit, a worker at the local Abilities Council (AC) just for people who have a brain injury, a weekly support group with the Saskatchewan Brain Injury Association (SBIA) and also a post brain injury life-skills program called Career Headways (CH). One girl I know, Renee, who had suffered a TBI last July is at a point today in her recovery where I was at eight or nine years after my first accident.

Today, I take part of each program in one way or another making my recovery somewhat of a smoother ride. I have an ABI worker, Cheryl, which I can talk to when I need to. I take part in some of the activities the worker from the AC, John-Paul, organizes, attend the weekly meetings and other activities (bake sales, camp outs). The last part of my recovery today is working with CH. At one time I was on the Board Of Directors of it and as of today I am the Computer Orientation Volunteer with CH.

Well that is enough from me today. I am sure I will add more in the future. I am waiting to hear from my lawyer. The sooner I hear from him the sooner you will hear from me. Have a good one. 8)

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