First I want to tell you about Shelby. She is now in second grade and absolutely loves school. She struggles sometimes with her math story problems and with reading but we continue to work daily on these. She is a joy to the teachers and they always make such positive comments about her ability to be a good friend to all. She is the one that teachers can count on if someone is having a difficult time or is a new student. She is in dance, swim team, Clover Kids, and a church youth group. Second, I went back to school and am finishing my teaching degree. I will be done in May of 2003 and student teach in the fall. I am so excited and can't believe I did it !! I was recently inducted into the campus's education sorority too. Last, I have met someone who truly loves me and my children and we are getting married this summer. I met him through a classmate of mine at college (it was her uncle) and began dating a year and a half ago. I never thought I would be so lucky to find someone again and who loves my children as his own. My fiancé has 9 brothers and sisters so all of a sudden, we are going from a small to large family. My children are also gaining a new grandma and grandpa which they think is neat. We are also moving to an acreage, complete with farm animals. My children and I have never lived on a farm so this will be a new chapter in our lives.

I am so thankful to the Lord for his guidance in our lives. My daughter is a miracle and my fiancé is the love of my life. I have never been more happy in my life. We are ready to move on in life and begin again. It can happen, I am proof of it !

Love to all the TBI'ers out there,
Lori, Dave, Tyler, and Shelby

The next thing I remember was being helped out of our car. I was in total shock, not being able to comprehend what had happened. Jake was screaming for his dad and Shelby was having a hard time breathing. She was throwing up and crying at the same time and then she started to "posture" which they say is an indication of a head injury. As I sat in the ditch, I looked into the car at the back of my husband and knew he was dead. I knew because no one was helping him. But no one told me anything until later on at the hospital.

They took us by ambulance to the hospital in Fort Dodge, Jake, Shelby, and I going separate ways. I had to have x-rays of my neck and spine, and stitches in my mouth. I had a fracture of my T-12 vertebrae. I had no idea where Shelby was or how she was doing. They took me back to a room where they stitched me up and then told me that Shelby was going to be life-flighted to a children's hospital in Des Moines. Her condition was very serious. I will never forget looking at her lying on that backboard, strapped down with a neck brace and not looking at me because she was unconscious. I just prayed to the Lord to take care of her and to watch over her. After she left, it was then that the highway patrol came in to tell me that Gary had died in the accident. My best friend, my husband, was gone. He had died instantly. He had ran a stop sign and collided with a truck and Gary had taken the brunt of the collision. I thought my world would stop right then and there but somehow, somewhere, an inner strength surrounded me and I knew I would have to be strong for my own kids as well as Gary's kids. I thank God that not all of us were with that day because there would have been more than one fatality I believe. I have a 12 year old and Gary has a 16 year old also.

My mom, and some friends of ours drove to Des Moines to be with Shelby. It was a 2 hour drive to get there. I had to stay the night in Fort Dodge because I was so banged up. My son stayed with me, God Bless his soul, he said, "Mom, you can't be left alone tonight." I never slept a wink that night, I had too many phone calls to make and I called Des Moines every hour to see how Shelby was. When I was discharged the next day, a friend took my son and I straight to Des Moines. She was in PICU, hooked up to so many machines. I gently took her hand and told her I was there, and I think she knew because her heart rate started to increase. There wasn't a scratch on her, she looked like she was just sleeping. Soft soothing music was playing in her room and I just sat by the bed and prayed. She opened her eyes once that night, which I took as a good sign. 2 days later she woke up in the middle of the night. She was moved upstairs to the pediatric floor where her recovery started. I am so grateful for my mother because she stayed in Des Moines with Shelby while I went back home to make funeral arrangements and to attend Gary's funeral. She slept a lot as she progressed through her stages. I think the hardest stage was the aggrivated stage. She cried all the time, she couldn't sit up or use her right hand. She could eat with her left hand but her right would shake. They put her in a Craig bed because she rolled all over and was too confined in a hospital bed. She was in that stage for about a week and a half. I had had to go back home to get Tyler back in school and to tie up loose ends and when I came back, she was smiling and feeding herself, and sitting up in a wheelchair. I was totally amazed because she was not doing any of those things before I had left to go home. The day after I came back, she started talking !!!!! I walked into physical therapy and her therapist said, "Shelby, who's that?" And she said,"Mommy." I bawled and thanked the Lord for bringing her back to me.

She quickly progressed through her therapies, she did physical, speech, and occupational. She remembered her ABC's, her 123's, her colors, shapes, etc. She remembered people, we had tons of pictures on her walls and she named everybody. She was truly a miracle child.

Shelby was in the hospital for 20 days. She was lucky, because I know there are many out there who are in for months at a time. She rides her bike, is in dance class, roller skates and swims. I am so thankful that God did not take her, I came close to losing her when they were life flighting her down, her vital signs started to drop above Ankeny, which is about 10 minutes from Des Moines.

I see a different child now though. Her short term memory is not always good, but it has gotten better. She cries easily and gets tired more often. She misses her daddy the most. She is so much like him, she talks about him a lot. She knows she has 3 special angels watching her from heaven, Daddy, Grandma Bettie, and Grandpa Kenny. She knows how special she is.

We take one day at a time, it will be 9 months on June 4, so hard to believe. I am so grateful to the TBI website because I get very frustrated on some days when Shelby is crying alot and I have no one else to talk to about those days. No one in my small town knows what we are going through. I also try to focus on the positive things; she could have been burned, lost a limb or broken a bone. Jake has recovered also and is learning to deal with the death of his dad. Think about those good things every day and thank the Lord you are here to enjoy life, even if it is different. Thanks for reading our story.

God Bless,
Lori, Tyler, and Shelby

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